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Afternoon cunts.
I'm Esme-free now, she's fucked off back to Eire for a week. What should I do with myself in the mean time?
(I helped save b3ta! Noit last used an unnecessary comma on, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:41, archived)
Change the locks?

(Cleisthenes Has a wii number now, be my friend! MarioKart!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:42, archived)
^This.

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK DING YOU STUPID HATS!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:43, archived)
this

(I helped save b3ta! Boudicca (B3tan down), Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:46, archived)
I want to say something really funny about a "Lock of hair", to change your meaning.
But I have no idea how a "Lock of hair" came about, how is it a lock?

Also, if she was scotish, I could add something funny about lochs.
(I helped save b3ta! Chef of Medicine [animal] Gonz, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:48, archived)
In olden days, before precision scissors
people used to put their head into a special sealed container filled with water, and all the excess hair on the sides would be hacked off with a knife. By raising or lowering the level of the water, the preferred hair style could be achieved. Hence, lock of hair.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine my life for ire!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:51, archived)
What tosh
its a old romantic thing to do which has been traced back to a old scottish village called Hair, which was to be found beside a loch.

Before going off into battle, the fighters would leave some of their hair behind with their loved ones, so that should they die then Richard Attenborough could bring them bring them back to life in `hair park`.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=rmLAj9iIfQk, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:57, archived)
Arf!

(I helped save b3ta! Todd the Todd yummy poo, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:58, archived)
versions of attenborough's film have been released to dvd the original doesn't last long
so attenborough removed most of the edits for a second version but they're only sold at airports

short term hair park or long term hair park

depending on which you prefer
(Mehitabel_Itrang is pulling your leg, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:01, archived)
Its a shame he does not last long
but then he is old.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=rmLAj9iIfQk, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:03, archived)
My only question is which one of you two is dressed up as Sandy Toskvig,
and which one as Frank Muir?
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK DING YOU STUPID HATS!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:07, archived)
I really wish I knew what all this Hair Park bollocks is about

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine my life for ire!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:09, archived)
it's like thorpe park
we're going to hair park
all the kids are smiling
we're going to have a lark
we're going to get a styling

all the men come back to life
they'll threaten you with their knife
bring the gran, it's two for one
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish i'm the one your stylist warned you about, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:22, archived)
thats easy
everyones a fruit and nutcase....
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=rmLAj9iIfQk, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:12, archived)

www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=lock
(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies I make computers, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:52, archived)
fuck i love that site

(.rigby ., Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:54, archived)
This was the first thing I did with that site, when I first heard of it.
www.etymonline.com/index.php?search=etymology&searchmode=none
(I helped save b3ta! Chef of Medicine [animal] Gonz, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:03, archived)
Ohhhh

(I helped save b3ta! Chef of Medicine [animal] Gonz, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:03, archived)
bris

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish i'm the one your stylist warned you about, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:49, archived)
What's the Jewish ritual circumcision ceremony got to do with it?

(I helped save b3ta! Kersal Missive Free Michael Shields! with Monday's Liverpool Echo, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:23, archived)
nothing

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish i'm the one your stylist warned you about, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:28, archived)
Try wanking.


HI NOIT.
(I helped save b3ta! ImNotRightBotheredMe someone like you & all you know & how you speak, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:42, archived)
I'm already red raw
HI INNERBUM
(I helped save b3ta! Noit last used an unnecessary comma on, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:13, archived)
Find your own personality

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine my life for ire!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:42, archived)
Celebrate

(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy on top of the tree, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:42, archived)
Make an Esme real doll.
Then when she comes back, act all confused.
(I helped save b3ta! Karl Hysteria, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:43, archived)
Bake some cakes

(I helped save b3ta! Nile, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:43, archived)
Post on here about how you miss your Esmey-Wesmey
and then you can both sicken us all with your cutesy messages of love

Then it'll give us all something to be grumpy about. It's win-win!
(I helped save b3ta! elusive meh, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:43, archived)
I miss her smelly minge and hairy tits already :(

(I helped save b3ta! Noit last used an unnecessary comma on, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:14, archived)
Get the rum out

(bogus official YES NO WIN LOSE, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:43, archived)
this

(I helped save b3ta! Kersal Missive Free Michael Shields! with Monday's Liverpool Echo, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:12, archived)
Whatever the hell you want.
She's not around to disapprove and scare you into complying.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK DING YOU STUPID HATS!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:44, archived)
Get to the top of the stats page.

(well, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:44, archived)
Upgrade your sex life to English.

(Cleisthenes Has a wii number now, be my friend! MarioKart!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:44, archived)
Did you make sure she packed properly?
Did she get everything she needs, you know, toothbrush, clothes, MP3 player, maybe a laptop, potatos, whisky*, leprechauns, socks, tablets, passport, phone, keys, wallet, charger, Signed photo of me in black'n'white laying down on a sofa....etc ?



* or is it whiskey, I always forget what one is what.
(I helped save b3ta! Chef of Medicine [animal] Gonz, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:44, archived)
Ireland - whiskey
Scotland - whisky
You can remember it because Ireland's got an e in it just like whiskey.
(rnuk - http://www.flickr.com/photos/rnuk/, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:58, archived)
Esme and whiskey both contain the letter E

(Mehitabel_Itrang is pulling your leg, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:04, archived)
Ahhh, aside from regionally, is there a difference?

(I helped save b3ta! Chef of Medicine [animal] Gonz, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:05, archived)
By god yes.
There's the world of difference between two whiskies from distilleries a matter of mere miles apart.
(rnuk - http://www.flickr.com/photos/rnuk/, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:35, archived)
become an indie pop star

(I helped save b3ta! spacefish i'm the one your stylist warned you about, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:45, archived)
I haven't got the right hair for indie.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit last used an unnecessary comma on, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:15, archived)
pull the other one
even mormons have the right hair for indie
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish i'm the one your stylist warned you about, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:18, archived)
move to france

(.rigby ., Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:46, archived)
France is closed.
It's been closed for weeks, & shut without warning. I've wanted a crêpe ever since.
(I helped save b3ta! ImNotRightBotheredMe someone like you & all you know & how you speak, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:48, archived)
ummmm crepes
they do make the best
the closed/lazy bastards
(.rigby ., Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:52, archived)
I don't want to.

(I helped save b3ta! Noit last used an unnecessary comma on, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:14, archived)
string of one night stands?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=rmLAj9iIfQk, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:46, archived)
starting with..

(.rigby ., Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:54, archived)
one night stand?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=rmLAj9iIfQk, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:59, archived)
i thought you might want to pick from the b3ta menu for him
save all that thinking once the shagging starts
(.rigby ., Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:00, archived)
Are you volunteering?

(I helped save b3ta! Noit last used an unnecessary comma on, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:15, archived)
i dont know. drink her rum?

(I helped save b3ta! TopUpTheTea nice one Chet!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:46, archived)
and eat all her potatoes
and crucify jesus
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish i'm the one your stylist warned you about, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:47, archived)
Mount Gay?
Yes, I am sure he does... BADUM TISCH!
(I helped save b3ta! trev New NSD podcast, in my profile, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:48, archived)
She's not left me any.
There is some voddie, though.
(I helped save b3ta! Noit last used an unnecessary comma on, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:16, archived)
I'll be over soon then! VODDIE!!

(I helped save b3ta! TopUpTheTea nice one Chet!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:21, archived)
Dance about in your pants
I recommend Justice
(I helped save b3ta! SugarSpunSister www.facebook.com/pages/SugarSpun/8347697732, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:48, archived)
Hang yourself.

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy Light, or visible light, is electromagnetic radiat, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:49, archived)
With fairy lights!
only 73 days
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:17, archived)
pick up the tattered remains of your old social life
remind your friends you still exist, get drunk, watch films with explosions in, wear that old shirt you like with the stains on, and generally do all the things you used to do before your spirit was crushed underneath the massive thumb of a significant life partner.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine my life for ire!, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:49, archived)
beautifully put

(.rigby ., Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:02, archived)
Buy a 'kiss me quick' hat and go for a promenade down the local high street
wearing nought but said hat and some y-fronts.
(rnuk - http://www.flickr.com/photos/rnuk/, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 16:59, archived)

Wank.
(Bombast, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 17:12, archived)