Was about this time last year...
I'd just got out of hospital after having a plate screwed to my ankle after breaking it in a New Year's Eve fracas.

So there I was, hobbling around on crutches when I realised I needed to take a dump. So off to the (downstairs) loo I go.

Got myself sat comfortably and it was only after several minutes with internal pain starting to build up that I realised I was constipated.

I sat there a while longer - wondering at the pain constipation gives, then decided as nothing was forthcoming, I might as well get myself upstairs to the slightly more luxorious bathroom.

Well, the effects of me hopping up the stairs seemed to unplug the blockage, I sat down and gave birth to (what seemed) The Perfect Poo - if somewhat wider than the orifice it emerged from (bought tears to my eyes).

Oh, my cat left me a lovely runny egg on the kitchen floor yesterday...
(snee held his breath since, Fri 28 Mar 2008, 10:00, closed)