Common phrases and Supermarket worries
1. "No offence, but...." is a nasty excuse to say something as hurtful as you like with (sometimes) the desire to cause huge offence. But it's ok though because I said no offence innit.

2. "Thing is" is often folllowed by a feeble excuse to get out of work/domestic chores. It doesn't make any sense to me this "Thing" abuse.

Ok enough nitpicking, now to tackle the supermarkets. Rhymes with Al fresco.
1. A few annoying checkout assistants took great offence to me placing my basket onto their conveyor belt. In fact they usually spurt out "There's a basket till at the end" and point sternly towards a 10 strong queue of people with baskets. Why would I intentionally waste my own time? As far as I'm aware it's not a legal requirement to have a basket at a basket till. It's not as if he gets to relax if he doesn't serve me.

2. Ranting about till regulations above reminded me of my days as a lonely checkout drone. One lady tried to go through my express till with a trolley load rather than the other monkey who had a conveyor belt etc. Also I pointed out my till was '10 items or less.' Her (genuine) response was "Does the computer only have the capacity for 10 items?"
Oh mercy.

3. Going into 24 hour stores after midnight I tend to find the shelf stackers look at you like you're some sort of freak for shopping at that time. Like they've seen a fucking ghost. YOU are the ones working mate!

4. The reduced section. Why do people just stop and stare at the items and not even move? Lord help us if people ever needed to ration again or if the major stores had a closing down sale. It would be chaos.
(muzzvsworld, Thu 8 May 2008, 5:45, closed)

Ricky Bobby
"With all due respect...thats a bunch of crap!"
(bazmorningstar just named him, "emerald monkey", Thu 8 May 2008, 11:30, closed)