as a lacky working behind a bar...
... i feel i have quite a large quantity of anger towards my customers. so here goes.

(deep breath)

people who have been standing waiting at the bar for 5 minutes and when i come to serve them the conversation goes along these lines...

me: what can i get you sir?
brainless idiot: pint of tetleys please
me: i'm sorry we don't do tetleys will smiths do??
BI: what? no tetleys. yes smiths then?
(ffs you've been staring at the taps for five minutes - do you see tetleys?)
me: abything else?
BI:oi, sharon what are you having? - a smirnof ice please
me: ok, is that all?
BI: no, a strongbow for the lady.
me: is that all??
bi: dave will you have a guinness?? yes?? a guiness please
Me:


for heavens sake, you've all been standing there for at least 5 minutes, how can you not know what you want to drink by that point?? you are just holding up everyone else and me.

longer than i thought but very theraputic.
(33% longer is struggling to think of a witty comment for here, Mon 5 May 2008, 15:07, closed)

Tw*t-arse
Haha, I used to work in a bar, and once some tw*t-arse came in, all cocky, ordered one pint of fosters and handed over a twenty pound note. With no tens or fives in the tills, I asked him if he had anything smaller. Cock-arse replies "Erm, haha, no I don't bloody think so! I never carry change, its soooo annoying." (What a c*nt-arse!) Imagine the look on his face when I gave him seventeen pound coins and a fifty pence piece.
(paisleypiglet, Mon 5 May 2008, 19:07, closed)

Too bloody right
As a fellow barman I say *click*

Annoys me no end.

AND this is the just the start of it!
*aways and types his own vent*
(Fleximus Rex is still confused on the whole "life" thing as of, Tue 6 May 2008, 4:08, closed)